Surviving the Terrible Twos: Money is a Big Deal

Money is a Big Deal

Creative Commons – Sean McMenemy

 

Here we are at week 3 and the final installment of Samantha and my 20s series, with the icky subject of Finances! I have loved discussing the awkward parts of  20s life with you all, so thank you for reading. Each week it has made me dig deep, think and look at my own life with a new eye.

Make sure you read Sam’s newest post HERE. Getting to know this girl better has been a privilege; she is funny, God fearing and true. I love that the internet has connected a Texan and Londoner to create this series. Two perspectives from two girls stumbling through their twenties. It’s been fun and I’m sad it’s over.

Week 1 – Careers
Week 2 – Dating 

Money is a big deal. You don’t realise it until you lose your wallet or debit card, and the simple things like buying your lunch become a problem. And if you’re like me, even though it’s a little out of your control, you still feel embarrassed or sheepish asking for someone to help you out until you can get some cash.

Which I think represents an awkward attitude that we have about money. I’m not sure what it’s like in other places, but in Britain it’s a fact that everyone has money and it’s no one’s business how much. The pay gap between rich and poor is a gaping chasm, even inside the walls of one office building, but no one talks about it. It’s a hush-hush subject and we’re all meant to keep up appearances, when often the reality is that a large amount of us are buried in debt.

My story is that I went from working full time at 18 without a financial care in the world and that being okay. To now at 23 with minimal savings and a permanent case of wanderlust, and it not being okay anymore. I used to think buying a house was for grown ups and I needn’t worry about such things for another ten years. I unconsciously put it in the “husband box” because responsibility comes with marriage, right? Then recently I had a brain wave; houses are expensive and I might not have a husband as soon as planned. Which means I would have to start saving a hefty amount each month now to buy a house by the time I am 30. Uh, which means, I need to be responsible now.

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Surviving the Terrible Twos: Discussing Dating

dating

Creative Commons – ClickFlashPhotos / Nicki Varkevisser

 

Welcome to the second week of Sam and my blog series on getting through your twenties. Today we are discussing DATING (ohh hell), and last week we discussed careers. Share your stories in the comments!

Be sure to check out Sam’s dating post here.

I can tell you how to be in a longterm relationship, and what not to do in one. I can tell you how to be perpetually single. I can tell you how to awkwardly tell someone that they have the “X-factor” you’ve been looking for… Yep, it happened, but in my defense it was long before that damn TV show existed. However, I cannot tell you how to “date” because a) the obvious and simple answer is to go on dates, and b) my experience within that arena is very limited.

I’ve had two first dates. The first first was a dive into the deep end, and the start to a serious relationship that I probably wasn’t ready for. The second first was spent freaking out about what personal information I was allowed to omit and what I wasn’t, because I don’t really have an internal “too much information” filter. Whew, stressful stuff. After forcing a second date, we agreed there wasn’t enough chemistry to go out again.

Two first dates and two very different outcomes, both of which I learned a lot from. And there you have my adult “dating” history. Therefore today there will be nooooo advice giving, ’cause this sister is as clueless as the next. But instead I will bring to you four discussion points that I hope you will weigh in on!

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Surviving the Terrible Twos: Careers

career

A few weeks ago I sent out a depressing tweet that said something along the lines of,

“No one tells you how hard your twenties will be.”

The lovely Samantha Jo Berry spoke up in agreement and said jokingly that she could do a whole blog series on it. Always a fan of a challenge and new opportunity, my immediate response was, “let’s do it together!”.

AND TA-DA, here we are. The ten years inbetween going to school and being a mature and full functioning adult is (insert profanity here) hard. It’s confusing and messy and lonely, despite the fact that we all go through it. In true twenties self-involved form, we think it’s only us that’s suffering. Such a lie. Which is why Sam and I are writing this series.

For the next three Wednesdays, Samantha of The Biggity Big Blog and I will come to you with our messy lives and lay it all out. Advice and whinging included, in equal amounts. Today we will cover Careers, the one thing I have a deep love/hate relationship with. Next week will be Dating, and that should be funny since my love life belongs back in primary school. And finally in week 3, Finances. The only advice that will include is what NOT to do because my money management skills are Dire with a capital D.

Your twenties is one thing you certainly cannot go under or over, because then you miss all the joys of going through it. Of which there really are many! We hope you enjoy the series and share your thoughts in the comments.

And don’t forget to read Sam’s post today on careers too, it’s a good’n.

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Yesterday over on the So Worth Loving blog I shared my struggles with holding my career in too higher esteem. It’s been a big head and heart ache for me since I left school, full of questions about my ability, talent and purpose. It’s made me cry and yell in frustration. It’s made me feel insecure in a city where everyone is someone and I’m lagging. We live in an era where young people are setting up businesses and living their dream because we are told “you can do anything!” and “never give up!”

What about when you don’t know what your dream is, let alone who you are or what you’re good at? What about when you need to pay the bills and don’t have the time or resources to pursue your passion? Continue reading